Tuesday, May 7, 2013

The Day That Changed Everything: Part 3

Back in December, I began writing about an accident that occurred about five and a half years ago that would forever change my life. This week is crazy busy for me because I have finals coming up, but some of you expressed interest in hearing more about that period in my life, so I wrote the (short) third part in between studying. ;-)


~

I don't remember what I saw when I opened my eyes. I remember, instead, the achy chill that wracked my body, so cold that I thought it would swallow me up. Dimly I heard my mother shout desperately for someone to get a blanket, to do something, as the violent shivers pulsed through my body. I don't remember if I spoke at all . . . it's as if the painful coldness engulfed my memories, froze my mind; nothing else mattered.

Blackness.


I was somewhere else now, another unfamiliar place, and my memories seemed oddly disconnected to each other, dreamlike and distant. I was warm again — someone had wrapped me in layers of blankets but the pain in my leg was unbelievable, like nothing I had ever felt before. A person next to my bed maybe my mom? was trying to get me to eat a cracker, but the mere idea of food was repulsive to me. I just wanted water, nothing but water, yet no matter how much I drank, I was still thirsty; it was as if the liquid dissolved on my tongue before I had a chance to swallow.

Somebody gave me pain medication through the IV in my hand and within two minutes, the sharpness seemed to disappear from my leg and I drifted into sleep.

It seemed as though immediately after I fell asleep, a nurse was shaking me awake. It was dark now, though, so maybe it had been hours. She felt my foot and asked if it was numb, asked me to wiggle my toes to make sure the circulation was still there.

My body felt hot all over. It was an odd contrast to the bone-chilling coldness that I had experienced earlier...The nurse checked my vitals and mentioned something about a fever. And then the chills came back. They were nothing like those that I had before, but they still sent unpleasant waves of coldness through my body.

She gave me more pain medication and my world dissolved into blackness once again.

Several times that night, the pain in my leg stole my sleep and filled my mind....the darkness seemed to drag on forever.

When it was light outside, a nurse tried to get me to sit up a little and eat some Cheerios. Sitting up brought an immediate rush of dizziness and achiness to my head, and the thought of food still made me feel ill, but she insisted. I complied and proceeded to throw up all over the bed. Oops. (I resisted the urge to say 'I told you so!')

Lying in that hospital bed, I had no way of knowing the incredible physical and emotional challenges that were in store for me. I had no way of knowing that, over the next few years, this incident would be the ultimate test of my determination, that there would be times when I would want to give up and cry about the unfairness of it all.

This was only the beginning of a very long road ahead.
(to be continued)

5 comments:

  1. Wow, sorry. just wow is all I have

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  2. It gives me chills to read this as its so close to us now! So glad you have never lost your spirit!

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  3. I need to know the rest of this story! I broke my femur when I was 6 or 7, I was learning to walk again after major surgery and took a step and it completely snapped. I remember that moment so clearly, wondering what the sound was, and then falling and screaming. Being bundled into the back of my auntie's car and speeding to the hospital so fast they had to alert the police to escort us. The rest is all a blur, my mom is a nurse and she drugged me up immediately, so I don't remember much. Except being in pain. I was put into a traction cast and spent several more months in the hospital/stuck in my wheelchair. I barely, barely avoided surgery. Crazy how similar this is, although it sounds like you were older than I was- I'm so thankful I cant remember much. But the sound of my leg snapping is forever ingrained in my memory. Thank you for sharing this. I'm sorry you had to go through it :(

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  4. I just read them all in a row, and read them all again and I am dying to know the rest of the story. You. You. You are going to develop your voice to where it changes the world. I adore you. Huge.

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  5. Hearing about this so recently from you it is so eye-opening to go back and read your actual posts about it. It's no wonder you had to wait a bit to write more about this - this part in particular seems agonizing. Sorry I am not more articulate. Sometimes there are no words.

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