Her eyes were filled with the warmth of her smile as she reached out her hand in greeting. At first glance, I was just another student interviewing for an internship position, probably unremarkable from the countless others that she had seen. And then I stood up.
I watched as her eyes flashed to my legs and for a moment I was reminded of something that my biopsychology professor had said in class about six months prior...He said that our brains have something like a filter—to maximize efficiency, our cerebral cortex tends to ignore information that is consistent with our previous life experiences, and it takes notice of what conflicts with our expectations.
My legs conflict with expectations, and for better or for worse, I guess that means that I'm remembered. I am not ashamed of my disability, but sometimes—especially in interview situations—I wish that my CP wasn't as conspicuous. I want people to see that I possess skills and abilities without a qualifier. I am not incapable, and I am not capable in spite of my disability. I am capable.
I guess my interviewers decided to give me a chance because I am interning for both of them this summer as a research assistant. I can't really go into details as most of it is confidential (it's a children's psych and neuropsych hospital), but between both positions, I am currently working 5 days a week from 8:30 to 4:30. Then I come home and tutor from about 5:30 or 6 until 11 o'clock at night...it's been a long week and I'm just now finally getting a chance to put on some pajamas, eat some chocolate, and take some time to relax!
I feel terrible that I've neglected this blog for two months (!!!), and I have so much to write about...I promise I will write more soon (and catch up on all of my blog friends!)...but for now, I'm going to SLEEP! Goodnight :)
(P.S. If you're reading this....thank you for coming back even after all this time! xoxo)